On missing out | The Life of K: On missing out

Friday, October 16, 2015

On missing out

This is a big weekend. Or, it could have been. There's a big blogging conference AND a big doula conference happening and I'm going to neither. I'm at home, nursing a cold, feeling sorry for myself.

I've never been to Blissdom (the blogging conference) and every year I feel like I'm missing out. See, blogging is something we do in isolation even though it's a "social" thing. I read a lot of blogs and know a lot of bloggers - we have online groups and we're great about sharing each other's stuff. I chat with these people day in and day out and consider them my friends.

Seeing them in person, like at Blissdom, really solidifies those friendships. The bloggers at Blissdom are going to put names to faces. They're going to talk in person and they're going to come away with the 3D version of their 2D friends. There's something about meeting in person, about sharing an experience like a conference, that really can't be beat.

Those bloggers are going to go home, full of information and inspiration, and they are going to see a spike in their followers and readership. The contacts they make will help them move their blog forward and possibly bring them new opportunities and income. It's amazing.

I'll just sit here and write.

Then there's the first ever Pro Doula conference taking place in Kansas City. Pro Doula is the new training and certifying organization in town (based in the US) and they provide training for birth and postpartum doulas as well as for placenta encapsulation. Their big thing is supporting doulas earning a living doing doula work.

I've taken the advanced business training with Pro Doula, am cross certifying as a birth doula, and have done the postpartum training in person in Toronto. They have a few groups on Facebook and one in particular that is for people who have trained with them. In that group, I've made a lot of friends and I've learned so much. It isn't easy building a business, again, something done almost in isolation. I'm lucky to have two great business partners, but a lot of work still gets done by myself, on my computer, after everyone is asleep.

The people I've met through Pro Doula (mostly online) are so helpful and kind and really want me to succeed. Meeting them in person would solidify that. I know because I met a few in Toronto and already we've seen the benefits. A I-refer-to-you-you-refer-to-me thing happening.

Hundreds of Pro Doulas are at the conference, soaking in everything they can, and forging friendships that will only strengthen over time.

I'll be over here by myself.

It's hard to not think that I'm missing out not being at Blissdom or the Pro Doula conference. It's hard not to think about the people I would have met in person. The faces and voices I would have seen and heard. It's hard to know that I won't have my head full of information and inspiration that I KNOW those bloggers and doulas will have. It's hard knowing I'm staying two dimensional to them instead of jumping off the screen and becoming a real person.

I'm definitely missing out.

Can I make my own inspiration? Can I work on growing online friendships without ever having met in person? Can I work on my blog and on my business? Yes. Yes! YES! And that's exactly what I'm doing. I'm using these missed opportunities to fuel me. I won't be able to attend all the conferences. I can't afford to travel and stay in hotels and I don't want to take time away from my family more than I do now. But I can power through and I can get better.

I'll sit here and write!

I'll get blog posts written and memes made for sharing. I will read and share content I like. I will engage with people on social media and get out to local events. I will work on making my business better, on growing into something bigger, on expanding. I will work on me: reading and learning and getting certified by another doula organization.

I'm inspired!

I can do this. I might be by myself. I might be just one person. But I got this.

What's inspiring you lately?


  1. I always feel that way during Blissom too - like everyone else is there, having a great time, and I'm totally missing out. Sigh. I'll try to just use it as inspiration, like you!

  2. Blissdom sounds like a great event. I agree that meeting online friends/co-bloggers in person is definitely a special experience! Sorry you missed out, but I'm glad it inspired you to keep working just as hard as always :)